Why Pick Up Is HARD & How to Make It Easier (+Infield)
What you'll learn in this article:
- Building an understanding why pick up is hard.
- The steps to make the journey easier.
- The mindset needed to attract better women.
- + BONUS: Infield clip where a girl calls me an ASSHOLE.
Pick up is probably the hardest thing you’ll ever do.
Seriously, it really isn’t easy. I’ve taught bootcamps with martial arts experts, or people who even fought in the war and I’ve heard them say:
“I don’t mind having bullets pass me by in war, but talking to girls scares the f*ck out of me.”
That’s pretty crazy if you think about it. One could kill you, the other could just be uncomfortable at it’s worst. Yet we still have this paralyzing fear when it comes to talking to women.
It also can be different…
Let explain you how I make pick up easier and the 4 reasons why you (think) it’s so hard.
Reason #1: Fear of the unknown
The first fear, is the fear of the unknown.
You don’t know how it will go. You have absolutely no idea if she’ll like you or if she’ll hate you, and that unknown, makes it that much scarier.
If you were to fall on the ground, you’d tense up your muscles to anticipate the impact. If you were to fall on a bed, you probably wouldn’t be as tense.
However, knowing what the surface you’re about to fall on makes all the difference because you just want to know what’s going to happen. When you talk to girls, you don’t know how it’ll go down, and that’s what scares you the most.
Reason #2: Fear of judgement
Fear of judgement from: Her, her friends, the strangers at the bar, your friends and even your own ego. For some reason, we place a high value on judgement and it can make or break us. For this reason, most people avoid approaching at all costs because the negative connotation that they think is linked with it, can be detrimental to their status and their image.
No way will they get rejected and feel the shame of judgement from all these people. They’d rather play it safe.
Reason #3: Comfort won’t help you
When you realize that these are irrational fears, when you stop putting so much value on stranger’s opinions of you, when you understand that talking to a girl more often than not will probably go much better than you anticipated, then you’ll look back and laugh at how you were acting.
In fact, what separates the guys who get really good at pick up from the guys who never get good at pick up is overcoming these two irrational fears.
Reason #4: Many variables but only one constant
In pick up, there are so many variables.
There’s the club, the music, the vibe, the environment, the lighting, the girls, the guys, the girls reactions etc.
All these variables are constantly changing and they will never be the same twice. So, having said that, accept that these variables are completely outside your control and you will never be able to change that.
There is however one constant in pick up that will always remain the constant.
That constant is you.
You may experience, different emotions, moods etc. However, you will always be you. The you right now, is awesome enough to take action and get results.
I have a very popular quote that I say to myself often to make me really embed this mind-set and that saying goes as follows:
“I am just as awesome today as I will ever be, and today I am awesome.”
- The fears you have in pick up are holding you back.
- These fears are completely irrational.
- There are many variables outside your control.
- You are the only constant in pick up.
The best way to get started is by checking out my FREE COURSE called Step by Step Attraction, which you can find below: